It’s quite surprising to me that there are MBTI types out there who actually like INTJs and actively seek them out (seriously) so I thought we should list out all the “rules” to dating our type in order to make it easier for us to be understood.
I’ll start off:
- 90% of the time I don’t feel anything, so when you accuse me of being cold it isn’t because I’m suppressing emotions, it’s because I genuinely don’t have any feels at the moment. When I do, and if I trust you, I will open up to you. This doesn’t happen often, so when it does, know that these are real emotions and that I do like you enough to let you see me in so much distress.
- If I offend you in anyway, just tell me. Be blunt and honest about what I did and why it upset you and be rest assured I won’t do it again.
- If you come to me with a problem, I will try and help you fix it. I don’t like seeing you upset so of course my natural response is to alleviate your source of pain/distress. If you would prefer a shoulder to cry on or a hug, just say it.
- I am very methodical when it comes to choosing a partner, and it takes time. Don’t think I don’t like you just because we’re not moving as fast as you would like. If you want to speed things up, make the first move, I will definitely appreciate this.
- Do not play games with me or do things to try and provoke an emotional response - I will delete you from my life.
- Do be honest about your feelings - I’m barely in touch with my own emotions, how do you expect me to be in touch with yours too?
- PDA? Lol no.
- What you see as criticism, I see as pointing out flaws/holes in your plans/logic. I am not attacking you, I am trying to explain why your idea doesn’t work and I can only do this objectively.
- I need my alone time and lots of space - please respect this.
- (If you’re a P) - I like to have a rough plan in place, if you don’t that’s fine but don’t attack me or call me rigid because of this. Just as you hate feeling restricted and bound by obligations, I hate feeling like there is no order/stability in my life. Compromise is key.
- If you are prone to infrequent emotional outbursts, please tell me beforehand how you would like me to respond. I can guarantee if you don’t, I will just stand there staring at you and probably make things worse. Also, I don’t mind random emotional outbursts - I know what they are like, I just tend to do it even less so than you.
- DO. NOT. INTERFERE. (With my plans and all. Tell me before doing anything)
- No frequent meaningless compliments. It will only make me awkward because I have no idea how to reciprocate.
- I enjoy GOOD, intelligent conversation over small, idle chat. Intelligence is sexy.
- Don’t be an idiot. I laugh at stupidity.
Any more rules people?